PROVO, NOW THAT WE HAVE YOUR EARS, WE WILL ANNOUNCE THE JUCIEST NEWS SINCE GOTH PROM!
20% OFF EVERYTHING IN THE ENTIRE STORE!
SWEATERS!
JEWELRY!
GOING, GOING, GONE!
PRESIDENT'S DAY SALE AT
COAL UMBRELLA!
COAL UMBRELLA!
COAL UMBRELLA!
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RECAP: Maht Paulos is tits. The Coal Umbrella is having a HUGE SALE. We got your attention, and now we don't need it anymore. Thanks for the mean comments, but really, it's all about the SALE!
20% OFF!
HAVE YOU HEARD?
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CUT OUT THIS TWEETY BIRD AND GET AN ADDITIONAL .05% OFF!
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COAL UMBRELLA! IT'S WHAT FUN IS!
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COAL UMBRELLA IS FREEING US FROM OVERPRICED VINTAGE!
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THAT'S YOUR SECOND CHANCE TO CUT OUT THE TWEETY BIRD!
SERIOUSLY BIG SALE!
*WHILE SUPPLIES LAST!
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HUNGRY AFTER A BIG SALE?
PRESENT ALL THREE HIDDEN TWEETIES
AND RECEIVE
AN
ABSOLUTELY
FREE
SPECIALTY DRINK
OF YOUR CHOICE
FROM
LOS HERMANOS!
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DIABLO VERDE! DIABLO ROJO!
CAN'T DECIDE?
BRING IN SIX TWEETIES!
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WHAT THE HELL! WE'RE THROWING IN ONE MORE TWEETY!
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12 comments:
no oner can deny 20% off is one hell of a deal. i could endure months more of verbal abuse if it meant i was going to get $5 off that lacoste sweater i've been eyeing!
People should buy the stuff at 95% off when it's still at DI and Savers.
isn't di more expensive than coal umbrella these days? last time i bought a t-shirt there it was $39.99
If that were the case then wouldn't your shirts cost like $400?
Don't believe you.
2 Kings 2: 23-24
http://scriptures.lds.org/en/2_kgs/2
If only they could sell my virginity back to me....
did you lose it at savers?
bring yer tweety grafics down to the KEWL FUNBRELLA'S! accepting all tweety graphics all year long! COOL UMBRELLA and tweeter graphs!
Provo Poosher at its best! Three cheers! Hip hip hooray! Hip hipp Hooray! Hyppp hiip huraye!
i know of a website that sells virginity back. that's where i bought mine back before going on a mission.
tweety bird can swing on my nuts
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